Get out of my way!
Said no one ever
So what?
Figuring out what’s in your way will allow you to:
- Be honest with yourself and others;
- Be more productive; and
- Enjoy your “me” time and time with others.
Have you ever told someone “Get out of my way!”
I’m not talking about when someone cuts you off while sitting in traffic by yourself. Do you have the guts to tell your partner or boss, “hey man, you’re in my way!”.
If you do, great! You can stop reading now and go enjoy the rest of your day.
If not, read on.
Why you need to and why it’s important
This, in essence, goes back to my post about expectations but it’s setting your own expectations and the others have of you. Not realising what’s in your way, communicating your roadblocks and not setting clear boundaries have dire consequences because it’s a double whammy. Say you run into a roadblock (Point A) and you are trying to get to your destination (Point B). Your partner is expecting you to be at where she expects you to be (Point C).
You have an expectation of what happens at Point A. The first expectation gap is at this point which is due to whether you’re expecting your partner to know that you’re at a roadblock or they are the roadblock themselves without them realising it.
You then have another expectation gap. You want to get to Point B and your partner expects you to be at Point C. Bam! Double whammy.
Practical and simple ways
One obstacle that you are faced with is within your physical space.
The other type is related to your mental space.
How to approach these obstacles is the key to getting the best outcome. Yes, you can say “get out of my way” but it might not result in the best outcome.
You need to think long-term with the approach that you stick with. Consider an alternative method if it’s causing you discomfort or even resentment.
Physical obstacles
Physical obstacles are inevitable when you are cohabiting or co-working. Inability to deal obstacles such as these leads to frustrations and bottlenecks and sometimes even resentment towards your partner and colleagues.
One way to approach this is to sit down with your partner, cohabiter or co-worker to set ground rules, expectations and/or arrangements.
A less formal approach is ideal when it comes to your partner. Think about the way you share your living space with your partner and apply the “little things” logic that we previously posted about. What little things can you do to make cohabiting with them easier and more pleasant for you and your partner? Things that come to my mind are getting up five minutes earlier to get ready in the morning, making two servings of toast and coffee or picking your clothes for the next day to avoid cramping in the closet with your partner.
Mental obstacles
Mental obstacles are less apparent and obvious as feelings and emotions are not as measurable or noticeable as bumping into someone in the hallway. You need to be more attentiveness in identifying these types of obstacles and assessing the impact they have on you. They can be hidden and disguised and present themselves at the worst time possible. Self-awareness is the key in making sure that you are on top of the mental obstacles that result in cohabiting and co-working. Find out more about increasing self-awareness in our previous post.
To be continued