The inevitability of regrets
So what?
Do you suffer from regrets? They come and go no matter how hard you try to ignore them or mitigate the changes of having regrets. It’s impossible to live without regrets no matter how hard you try. By learning to live with regrets, you will:
- Admit to messing up;
- Not feel like a failure when you regret;
- Embrace regrets and not let yourself down; and
- Encourage your thoughts and be more present.
You are not perfect
None of us are born without flaws. Whether you are born with birth defects, gave your mum a hard time at birth or brought tears of joy, you are born with flaws and shortcomings. As you grow and live the life you’ve been given, your body, mind, actions and inactions will neither be perfect or flawless. Someone, somewhere, including yourself, will find imperfections and flaws that will be drawn out which inevitably will lead you to regrets.
Interrelationship
Everything you do in life is interrelated whether you are aware or not of the connection between them. The chain of events that occurs from your action or inaction will and do flow through everything around you. The action that you take or inaction you don’t take will somehow make its way to other aspects of your life and presence that alter your path and cause good or bad outcomes. Would you stop doing what you are doing because of the chance that something bad might happen? Or would you do something because of the chance that something good might happen? You can’t foretell the future or future events and how your actions and inactions will be interrelated to everything that’s happening around you. There will always be regrets of what you do and don’t do if you dig deep enough to find the interrelations of your actions and inactions.
Part of life
A way that you avoid and disassociate yourself from regrets is to oppress your thoughts and emotions that stem from regrets. You are burdening yourself when you attempt to avoid regrets. The harder you try to control and manipulate your thoughts and emotions, the harder they become to fight them out of your mind. As you know, oppression is a step backwards in being more present and aware of yourself and your surroundings.
My experience
While writing the paragraph about interrelationship, I was reminded of a book that I read in high school. The Five People You Meet in Heaven written by Mitch Album is about a mechanic named Eddie who died in an accident and was sent to heaven where he meets five people that had a significant impact on him or by him. The book illustrates all the ways that your actions and inactions are interrelated whether you like it or not. Thinking about this book again after more than two decades reminded me as to why I have the mindset (which I refute in my later post on how to deal with regrets) of “I’d rather regret doing something than not doing something”. The reason being, regrets have been part of my life whether I like it or not. And with this mindset, I accepted that regrets are inevitable.
What now?
- Come to terms with the fact that regrets are inevitable.
- Stop wasting your time and energy on trying to avoid regrets.
- Be on the lookout for our future post on how to deal with regrets.